Does Your Zodiac Sign Explain Your Behaviour.

ARIES

This week's lockdown? Cholera or plague? Bookish ninja. No remark on masks. I was accused of "opinion shaming" others last time because I followed WHO guidelines.

Taurus

My hair has spiders. That's it. This happens when you stroll in spider-hidden trees and bushes. You may stumble into their webs. 

Gemini

The assumption is that you must work for someone else, serve the market, and be a good capitalist. Freebies aren't as valuable as paid ones. 

Cancer

How do you handle disrespectful coworkers? Do you forgive or bury? Only watching them sleep is stalking. You probably drink tea and resent them. 

Leo

Please maintain the two-metre social distance after the lockdown? UK shoppers are queuing around the block to shop at Primark, our favorite sweatshop enabler, despite coronavirus concerns.

Virgo

Inexplicable long scratches cover each leg. They appeared mysteriously overnight. Claws trying to draw you to Hell. Or the IRS is following you.

Libra

Indiana Jones enrages. Avoid Indy 5. Disney does it for shareholders. Spielberg's exit is bittersweet, yet fans still resent the Crystal Skull. 

Scorpio

You often think people are awful. You often think people are kind. Someone confirms one position for every other.

Sagittarius

Read any book: Free Kindle sample. Kindle sample. Note the contents. Brainstorm each segment. Imagine the book. Write yours. 

Capricorn

Negative sentiments, snark, bitterness, and sarcasm should be expressed inside. You'll say little. So sorry. Thank you. 

Aquarius

Smartphones struggle to make calls, while dumbphones do. Specialists are better at what? This week, intensify. 

Pisces

Stars are misaligned. Your star sign may have changed. We ignore Ophiuchus, the 13th zodiac sign. 

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